CRACKPOTS

by Maryanne Paterson

Short Film
Email: [email protected]

The old saying, respect your elders is put to the test when an insane old man and a rough tough bikie share a hospital room. Aprox 6 mins Comedy

 

CRCK POTS

Written by
Maryanne Paterson
Story by
Rebecca James
Second Draft

 

Maryanne Paterson © 2006
13 Diamond Sand Drive
Upper Coomera
QLD, 4209
Mobile: 0424628806
Email: [email protected]
Website: wwww.freewebs.com/banjoscripts

 

 


1. INT. BIKIES GARAGE – DAY

BULL a large, tattooed bikie expresses his love for his Harley by polishing it carefully with a buffing rag.  Every stroke is precise and perfect.  He stands back and admires his exquisite machine (model Harley yet to be determined).

Bull climbs on his bike, pushes it forward and off the stand then starts her up.  In seconds he is off down the driveway.
 
2. EXT. FRONT OF MERV’S HOUSE – DAY

A suburban house on a busy road, perfectly manicured gardens trim the flower beds and a double lock up garage sits to the left.
An old man, MERV, eighty, short, hunch back, small build slowly shuffles from his front door to his garage.  His face is not revealed.
    
At arms length he holds the garage remote and brings it closer to his nose, then presses the button.

The garage opens.
    
He shuffles to his car, an old classic (Model yet to be determined) and reverses out.
He turns the engine off, gets out of the car and again at arms length brings the remote to his nose and presses the button.

The garage closes.
    
With a grandpa hanky he wipes a smudge off the door, smiles, gets back in the car and continues to reverse into heavy traffic.

Cars slam on breaks, horns honk and near misses occur to accommodate Merv’s inconsiderate driving ethics.
The car stops then drives forward and off screen.

Bull speeds past on his bike and off screen... we then hear a huge SMASH.

3. INT. HOSPITAL ROOM – DAY

The room is dim with only the dull glow from the nurses’ station offering any light.  There are two cubicles; the first is draped in a curtain surrounding Bulls bed.  TV’s hang from the ceilings at the end of each bed.

Bulls P.O.V. - A NURSE, slim and well developed wheels a squeaky wheelchair carrying a worse for wear Merv into the room.  (Merv’s identity will not be revealed until later.)  His shadow is exaggerated with his leg in a cast and elevated, his nose seems to extend further than humanly possible and his build... huge.

The nurse pulls the curtain slightly open and looks in.  Bull lays motionless.  Large rods and screw protrude from his head and wires prevent any jaw movement.

    NURSE
   (Sweet)
Hey Bull we got you a room mate. 

Bull looks toward the huge shadowed figure in the wheelchair behind the curtain.  He nods slowly, eyes wide.

Bull’s P.O.V. - The nurse wheels Merv to his bed and helps him in, fluffing the pillows behind him.  The exaggerated shadow of Merv is clearly seen from Bulls bed as huge and scary.

4. INT. HOPITAL ROOM – NIGHT

Bull is snoring loudly.  The huge shadow in the next bed moves... Aggravated...annoyed by the snoring.

The volume to the TV slowly rises louder... louder... loud enough to drown out Bull’s snoring.

Bull’s P.OV. – The motionless shadowed figure lies in the bed, his leg elevated.

Bull tosses and turns as best he can, annoyed by being woken.

CUT TO

Bulls snoring is heard loud and boisterous in the back ground.  Mervs light switches on.  His shadowed figure tries to turn the TV volume up but nothing happens.  He hits the remote against the bed...still nothing.  We see his shadow slowly look up to the ceiling.  The camera looks up in the same direction and there it is...the power lead has been pulled out.  Slowly Mervs shadow looks in Bull’s direction.

CUT TO

Bull wakes to the loud TV again.  He feels for his TV remote in the darkness and tries to turn his TV on... nothing.  He looks up and sees the TV is completely gone, ripped from the ceiling.  He huffs as he looks at the huge shadowed figure.

CUT TO

The TV is blaring again.  Bull picks up his buzzer...the cord has been cut.

CUT TO

Bull wakes coughing and unable to breath.  We see cotton balls shoved up his nose.  He rips them out and takes a deep breath.  He glares at the shadow.

CUT TO

Bull is sitting up in bed, his dinner on the bed table before him.  He unwraps a straw from its paper coating then lifts the cover of his dinner BUT... the plate is empty.  The figure in the other bed is expressing with hmm’s how nice his dinner is.  Bull Huffs

CUT TO

Bull wakes from a deep sleep, the room dim.  The sound of a drill underneath him stiffens his bruised body with fear.  He looks at the next bed... nothing, it’s empty... His eyes widen.  The drill stops, he sighs with relief.  The drill starts again.  Franticly his eyes dart from side to side.  He looks at the bible sitting perfectly on the bedside table.  His hand feels for the emergency buzzer... suddenly the bed moves.


    BULL
   (Whimpers)
  Hmmmmm...

The bed quickly folds up with Bull inside.

    BULL (CONT’D)
  Hmmm...Hhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

His screams are muffled by the smothering of the collapsed bed and the wires clamping his jaw shut doesn’t help.

A NURSE, large, short and scary, rushes to Bulls aid, his arms and legs poking out.  The shadowy figure has returned to the previously empty bed.

5. INT. HOSPITAL ROOM – DAY

Bull is lying in bed.  His neck is in a brace, the rods in his head are bent out of shape, an icepack sits on his groin and his bed has been replaced with an older manually operated style. 

He looks over at the figure in the other bed.  The figure is motionless.  Bull takes a deep breath and huffs flaring his nostrils.  

CUT TO

A nurse is dressing Bulls skun knuckles with a brown antiseptic dye.  She turns her back for a moment and Bull takes the small vile and hides it under his pillow.

CUT TO

The meals sit on the bed tables.  Mervs’ shadowed figure is seated in his wheelchair.  Squeak...squeak he wheels into the bathroom. 

Peeing is heard from the bathroom.

Bull awkwardly gets out of bed being extra careful not to get hit head brace caught on anything.  He pulls out the small vile and adds a touch of the brown antiseptic dye into Merv’s hearty beef soup.

The peeing stops and Bulls franticly turns, eyes fixed on the bathroom door...the handle. 

The peeing resumes, short and spermatic. 

Bull breaths...

As he turns to get back into bed the rods protruding from his head get caught in the curtain.  He twist and tugs, the peeing stops... his eyes peer through the tangled curtain at the door handle.  He twists some more.  The handle moves.

CUT TO

Bull is in bed, curtains drawn and slightly swaying.  The squeak, squeak of the wheelchair is heard as Mervs’ shadow wheels up to the bed table.  Bull watches as the huge figure slurps the soup straight from the bowl.

6. INT. BATHROOM – NIGHT

The squeaky wheelchair leaves the bathroom.  A cake of soap slides across the floor just as the door closes.  It stops on the bathroom tiles.
Soap residue coats the shower tiles, floor, walls and hand rail.

CUT TO

We follow Bull, with bum showing through the gap in his hospital gown, as he enters the bathroom. 
He removes his gown, now bare bummed and places one hand on the hand held shower head and one on the swivel tap.  As the water splashes and splutters out the shower head slides from his hand...his feet start slipping...he reaches for the hand rail, shower head hose in his other hand but alas...that offers no assistance and in an almighty thud his arms and legs fly into the air and crash to the ground with an agonising groan.

    BULL
Awwww...

 


7. INT. HOSPITAL ROOM – NIGHT

Bull is in bed.  The rods protruding from his head are even more mangled, his leg plastered and elevated, his neck is in a brace and both elbows are strapped and fixed into place.

The other bed still hidden by the curtain is empty.  A sigh of relief fall over Bulls face...he is safe...for now anyway.
An announcement is heard over the P.A. system.

    WOMAN V.O.
   (Filtered)
Good morning.  Father Cornbull, who is staying with us, is available to chat with.  Anyone who wants to talk over problems or feeling, drop by the visitors lounge and Father Cornbull will be happy to listen.

Bull awkwardly gets out of bed and into an electric wheelchair.  He slowly exits the room.

INT. HALLWAY – DAY

Bull heads for the elevator.  Behind him he hears a squeak... squeak.  With eyes wide he turns and looks at the occupant of the squeaky wheelchair.


Shock fills his face as he sees the little old man, Merv from the accident.  The brown antiseptic dye from the soup has formed a permanent joker like smile on Mervs’ face.

With an angry growl Bull pushes the forward control and charges toward Merv.  The two duel with their broken legs, pushing and shoving.  Suddenly Merv breaks free, spins and with great force pushes the wheels gaining speed as he tries to escape his enemy.

Bull takes chase.
  
Merv looks behind him and as he looks forward again there are stairs and not enough time to stop.  Merv hits the stairs and jolts down them bumpety bumpety all the way to the bottom landing with a CRASH.  Bull slows up and smiles.

CUT TO

8. INT. HOSPITAL CHAPEL – NIGHT

Bull is sitting alone reading from the bible.  The young nurse enters.

    NURSE
Father Cornbull, I need to ask something of you.

Bull closes his eyes and slowly nods.  He pats the seat next to his indicating for her to sit down.  His eyes compassionate.

    NURSE (CONT’D)
The dear old man who had the accident down the stairs yesterday is unlikely to make it through the night.  Could you please read him last rights so he can pass away peacefully?

Bull manages a devilish smile, his eyes evil with vengeance.


THE END

 

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